Wednesday, August 20, 2008

Have You Seen This Dead President?

I'm getting reckless and/or senile. I either spent a $100 bill in the last two days or I lost it. It's a 50/50 possibility. If you find it, let me know okay?

By the way, does everybody know what a douche-bag Andrew Jackson was to the Native Americans? I read Sarah Vowell's "Assassination Vacation" recently and learned about the "trail of tears" and it's appalling.

What's more appalling is that I'm only now truly learning my American history. I hadn't realized that the pro-America propaganda was in full-effect in my grade school history books. I recommend Sarah's book (any of them actually), Howard Zinn's "People's History of the United States," which is exhausting and rightfully so, and "Lies My Teacher Told Me" by James Loewen. I am not anti-American. Please. I have a friend who suspects that I am, and takes more steadfast stands when it comes to unconditionally defending American interests than I am inclined to, since I question whose "interests" these are. I do not thrive on condemning my home country and hope for it to learn a lesson by self-destructing, as the right often accuses the left of doing. I question that very ploy by the right to repudiate even sane accusations by the left. This line of thought continues here if you are prepared for a thoughtful tirade.

In Huckleberry Finn, Huck has to go through an "unlearning" process before he can relearn the truth. I think this a key concept in the transition from childhood (when you absorb without question) to adulthood (when the critical mind has developed...hopefully.) Did you see the movie "Jesus Camp"? Jesus! Those kids will never unlearn that shit.

As for Andrew Jackson, maybe we should start a petition to get a new Jackson on the twenty. Randy from American Idol maybe. NO! Mahalia! Yeah. But then we'd obviously need to put Aretha on the hundred. And Dinah on the one. And Abby on the five! Yeah baby! But who on the fifty? Amy? Nahhh. Eddy. But what Hamilton would go on the ten? Edith?


(Above) Andrew Jackson, Randy Jackson, Mahalia Jackson



(Above) Ulysses S. Grant, Eddy Grant, Amy Grant



(above)George Washington, Dinah Washington, Freddy Boom Boom Washington


(above) Abraham Lincoln, Abby Lincoln


(Above) Alexander Hamilton, Tom Hamilton of Aerosmith

1 comment:

David Kutcher said...

You need Kurt Cobain on the $100. Cuz he's money.

Plus I think he'd appreciate the irony.