Neuroticmancer

I haven't written anything here in a month or more. Something's clogged the pipes and I don't know exactly what it is. I've been reading a lot. All at once. Linchpin by Seth Godin, Reality Hunger by David Shields, Love and Sex With Robots by David Levy, You Are Not A Gadget by Jaron Lanier, The Notebook by Jose Saramago, and the new Lapham's Quarterly. This is highly evolved A.D.D. I simply can't just start a book and finish it and move on to the next one. I take bites out of each and then come back to them later. Like one of those cafeterias where you load up the tray with crazy combinations and end up with corn in your pudding. I actually work this way too, jumping from one project to the next. Luckily that's exactly what my job requires. So maybe I haven't felt like adding to the onslaught of words in the world. Reading is the teeter to writing's totter though and I strive to do both in tandem. Get the balance right.
My dream life has been complex and ornate recently. I try to capture the fragments that don't make it off the dream stage to the unconscious backstage area in time when I open my eyes in the morning...those stills from the film that I then try to lay out in front of me in the hopes that they will trigger more complete memories. Offer a chronology or a hindsight storyboard. The emotions I have in my dreams have been more vivid than my waking emotions. It's exhausting to sleep. The dreams have been a little like LOST. There's lots of information and I can't assimilate it. Are these clues to something bigger or just random scenes?
I got a bill from Cooley Dickinson Hospital for an appointment and procedure I never had and doesn't even apply to me but I can't get any answers until Monday and that's unnerving me.
I think I got overcharged last night at Paradise City Cafe. This pisses me off because I don't even like that place. I had a beer with my friend Max there and he encouraged me to get up earlier and start going to the gym. He says everything else will fall into place if I do that. Sometimes living alone there's no one to keep me in check....to judge me when I have ice cream at 2AM or cheer me on to go the gym. I let myself get away with all kinds of bullshit.
I posted this newspaper headline on my Facebook page that said "Republicans turned off by size of Obama's package" and something crazy happened with it. I started getting literally hundreds of Facebook friend requests from total strangers. How does a Facebook post go "viral" and why would all these people want to friend me just because they found it amusing. Lots of them sent personal messages. Some solicitous. One really nasty one.
I'm going to a pot luck in Williamsburg tonight and I'm riding with a friend. I get nervous when I'm someplace and have to depend on someone else for a ride home. It's people I don't know either so they're going to ask me questions about myself. Help! My old girlfriend and I flew to Portland, OR in 1999 or so to visit a married couple who were her friends and I hated being there so much that I feigned illness and hid in bed the whole weekend. The guy decided he wanted to teach me how to make beer. I just wanted it to end. That's how mature I can be.